Sinoplasty
_From: chinese ****_
"pls learn to respect chinese as we are trying very hard to use english, your language, to communicate with your white dumbs who don't even know a single of word mandarin."
It's good to have fans. It's been a while since my last post, and things are hectic here in the DMZ, the lost land between China and the West, where my Anglo side fights my Asian better half to the death do us part. Expect more frequent posts if I win. It doesn't help that in Chinese, what I do is called _"playing computer."_ Even when I'm working, she thinks I'm slacking - I think my wife would respect me more if I was a coal miner.
Starbucks has nothing on the God of Coffee. (submitted by Paul from Chicago, who says, "maybe this would help parishioners stay awake during the sermons.") Have you ever seen a cow or a 3-toed sloth? I think God drinks decaf.
How do I know if I have a chattel? Is it anything like Rickets?
Swift as lightning - in other words, fast. **BLOG WHAT I LOVE TO BLOG!**
Mineral water? Um, guys - this is a mop. Akin to calling a toothbrush "natural saliva."
Screw the Transformers, I'm calling the **AD HOC FIGHTERS**! They don't sound too organized, though. Is it like a flash mob?
How come my Oreos never wished me well? Ingrates.
Not only is this a fragrant crispy entry, apparently the theme is "Pieces." And below that? "Excellent dose of delicious food adds onions. Crispy crispy good flavour." But what the HELL is that soup? Are those KIWI???
Thank god I got these panties on the rack and not off of a live 13 year old. I'm too pretty for prison. In jail, they don't need ecial occasis to have their own fragrant crispy entry.
I added the purple line to show how off-kilter the text was, and besides that, they misspelled their core business. Saatchi and Saatchi, they're not.
Right next to the πrada bags.
I think these are ECNALAB WEN shoes. TI OD TSUJ.
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Starbucks has nothing on the God of Coffee. (submitted by Paul from Chicago, who says, "maybe this would help parishioners stay awake during the sermons.") Have you ever seen a cow or a 3-toed sloth? I think God drinks decaf.
How do I know if I have a chattel? Is it anything like Rickets?
Swift as lightning - in other words, fast. **BLOG WHAT I LOVE TO BLOG!**
Mineral water? Um, guys - this is a mop. Akin to calling a toothbrush "natural saliva."
Screw the Transformers, I'm calling the **AD HOC FIGHTERS**! They don't sound too organized, though. Is it like a flash mob?
How come my Oreos never wished me well? Ingrates.
Not only is this a fragrant crispy entry, apparently the theme is "Pieces." And below that? "Excellent dose of delicious food adds onions. Crispy crispy good flavour." But what the HELL is that soup? Are those KIWI???
Thank god I got these panties on the rack and not off of a live 13 year old. I'm too pretty for prison. In jail, they don't need ecial occasis to have their own fragrant crispy entry.
I added the purple line to show how off-kilter the text was, and besides that, they misspelled their core business. Saatchi and Saatchi, they're not.
Right next to the πrada bags.
I think these are ECNALAB WEN shoes. TI OD TSUJ.
---